TJ, Steph, Mom and sweet Cake Lady Jen, please do not read this post. Friday night's sweet memories should left untainted and to be treasured the way you remember them now.
What you don't know will not hurt you.
******************************************************************************************
Explanation. Apparently, if you pull 5 T-bone steaks from the freezer at 3pm Friday afternoon and need them to defrost by 6 for dinner at brother's, creative methods of uber-defrosting need to take place. But, it just so happens that the hot water coming out of our faucets is approximately 3200 degrees Fahrenheit. Sweet. Problem solved.
I submerge the 5 T-Bone steaks from Raising 5 Cattle Company in scalding hot water and allow for fast unfreeze and am sure to look like a hero when the fiance comes home. Off to hair, makeup and wardrobe. Done. Now, arrival back to the kitchen only to find a slight hitch in my plan. Apparently water can cook steak. Who knew? (Apparently everyone.) Instant removal from still steaming water, OUCH. Frantic search for Aloe-Vera plant, don't have one, should have listened to Mom. OUCH. Burning hand. Semi-cooked steak.
Glance at clock, 5:30, fiance home any minute, potential for major downgrade from heroine status. Inspect 5 steaks and find one more bloody and less tan-ish/steamed than the others. This steak is placed on top of the others and never mentioned again.
No one noticed, or at least they were polite enough not to say anything. A more likely scenario is that the steaks from Raising 5 Cattle Company are so good they can survive a slight steam to 'sear in the juices' and still be delicious! Perhaps I did seize this opportunity to plug my sisters cattle company. But the story is true. You can't make this stuff up.
HAHAHA !! I laughed, blondie (uh I've done the same thing.......when I was 10 !!!) C,mon lady ! What type of wife are you gonna make if you "boil/steam" your man's steak? You're on "Steak Time Out".
ReplyDeleteDuly noted. I will add this to the list of my "Food Time Outs."
ReplyDelete1. pizza - cardboard doesn't taste good, even flambee'd on the bottom of a perfectly good DiGiorno.
2. Fried eggs - stupid yolks.
3. Boil-in-a-bag Brown Rice. Pot ruined, $20. Brown rice ruined, $5. It was Lonn's last pot...Slate says, "Lonn doesn't have a pot to piss in!" Priceless.
David says: "She did what to my meat?" Ahh, you inherited the Wilma Cooking Gene -- everything fried on high and turned during a commercial. I will not mention the cigarette ashes that might have been involved. (: At least you have good meat to hide behind! www.raising5.com
ReplyDeleteWilma Cooking Gene: The ability to place a slice of pineapple on a leaf of lettuce, slap some miracle whip in the center and call it desert.
ReplyDeleteOMG, I totally fogot about that 'desert.' What the heck kind of food is that anyway? It like a lazy person's fruit salad??? It was good though.
ReplyDeleteHa Ha Ha ..... good one Dyna ! Well atleast you tried. Its the thought that counts ! I miss that face of yours and am SO excited and Happy for you and Lonn !
ReplyDeleteAnn :o)